Silly-Con Valley

A teacher who is on the committee to help recommend what software be loaded onto new computers that the district purchases has asked for her colleagues’ assistance. She would like our feedback on our current software situation. She had questions involving the same old same old. Should we continue with Office 2003 or upgrade to 2007? Do we still need to load Appleworks on district machines? Stuff like that.

Then came my favorite question. Is there any kind of software we would like to see on the student computers in the lab? I took the question like we were brainstorming for our dream software. I’d like to have a software where the computer makes a mocking dumb-dumb sound effects when the kids type a paper like they are texting on a cell phone.

“Doo-dee-doo-dee-doo.”

Or, I’d like to see a program where, a message window pops up and covers the entire screen saying, “We’ve got databases dumbass, use them,” every time they try to do research through Google.

What would be really neat is if the computer popped out arms and legs like a Transformer and beat a kid silly when they tried to copy and paste a research paper together.

Now that I think about it, that last one is probably a hardware issue rather than a software one.