No Balls

I just found out that the baseball complex here at Springwood Lakes will be replacing its batting cage for two and a half times my salary. Yes, this will be a rant about the uneven distribution of funds for our public’s education. Yes, I do recognize the importance of sports in academics. I lettered myself in high school and college. And while I am in recognition mode, let me take care of the fact I know we’re talking about a batting cage, a fairly (as far as baseball is concerned) prominent accessory, and not just chalk for the base lines. I know this. It’s just that this batting cage was replaced five years ago.

That means that if my math is right, then the district is paying me the same amount for service each year as they are the batting cage. Pretty sad, I know. I’m going to have to ask how the batting cage did it. It took me two degrees and a stipend for being certified to teach visually impaired students to get to where I am today. What’s its secret?

Actually, I pride myself on being a better deal. I mean I work with 325 students on a daily basis. That makes over 23,000 assignments that I’ll have to deal with. And by “deal with” I mean create, modify, introduce, grade, and review. That’s the lifecycle of an assignment. Then with other duties like tutoring or monitoring the cafeteria, halls, and bus areas, this school gets even more of my services. Clearly, I’m more cost effective than a batting cage.

Still, I wonder. I wonder what would happen if I tried a little experiment. I would give people an option to either pay to have me teach their child a lesson or, for an equal amount, knock a baseball at me. Which option would pay better?