Friday, October 16, 2009

An Idle Situation

I haven’t done a Hobo Teacher Tip in awhile and that fact kind of hits my point home. Why? It is because I was recently lax on one of the cardinal rules of teaching, and it bit me in the ass. I guess that happens with anything that you’ve done for some time. The chance of getting a bit sloppy in your performance increases. With that I said, I felt like I should share a reminder with you guys so you don’t fall into the same trap I did.

Hobo Teacher Tip #3: Never have any down time in your class. Never!

Usually, I have a number of learning opportunity tasks queued-up to compensate for the crappy ass jobs that a majority of my kids do with their previous work. This time, for some reason, I didn’t. I don’t know why. It is the end of the week and with grades having to be in last Friday I guess my stockpile got depleted a bit.

I can’t really blame the kids though. They’re weapons of mass distraction. They do what comes natural to them. That’s why with about ten minutes left in my seventh period, a kid blurted out, “If I owned an ice-cream store, then I would call it ‘Booty Shakes.’” His pen stopped for eight seconds. What are you going to do?

And of course that started a chain of events involving students turning off the mute of their stream of consciousness. “You could have chocolate coming out of an ass,” chimes in one child.

Pointing to her chest, ass, and crotch a girl blurts out, “milk, chocolate, lemonade!”

Crazed laughter envelopes the room. I’m suffering from jack-a-ninny dioxide poisoning! So let this be a reminder to something that we all know. Avoid leaving students to their own devices.

It’s a shame that I can’t keep a pile of rocks in my room that they can move from one side of the room to another as a backup. With my luck they would probably build the very first Booty Shakes with them.

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