E-Hell

Man, this administrator sent out this e-mail and it was so long. “How long was it,” you ask?

It was so long that that I had to stop and make camp for the night so I could get a fresh start on finishing it in the morning.

It was so long that Harold Bloom wrote an article on its symbolism.

It was so long that Peter Jackson is going to shoot it as a trilogy.

It was so long that I began circling letters, looking for a hidden message.

It was so long that you could pull it apart like a worm, and it became two separate e-mails.

It was so long that the entrance of a hip club was at the end of it.

It was so long that it had buttresses.

Now this rant is too long.