Friday, January 23, 2009

On paper, things don’t look so good.

One of my kids left one of those cootie catchers on the floor. At least that’s what we used to call them back in the day. Those of you who are not of the dorky variety, I’m talking about one of those paper fortune teller thingies. They have numbers and colors on them and by selecting a certain combination of the two a moment of your future is predicted. I took a picture.

Like I said, I think one of my kids made it because one of the colors is WIGHT. God, I feel like the worst teacher ever.

To make sure though that it does belong to one of my students, I better play a few rounds. Here we go:

1, 2, 3

And the answer is: One day everyone you know and love will die.

Hmm, okay—very William Cullen Bryant Thanatopsis like. Maybe my teaching has actually gotten through to these kids. This calls for so further investigation:

1, 2, 3, 4

And I am warned: Stop playing this game fag!

What should I do? Should I stop? Should I forge on? Perhaps the cootie catcher is using reverse psychology on me! Let’s do this! Let’s give this thing a go one more time:

1, 2, 3, 4

In five years you’ll die of herpies!

Oh! I should have listened! Damn you cootie catcher! Damn you!!!

So is herpies like a much deadlier strand of herpes or something?

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