If you don't look good, I don't care.

One of my students asked me today how often I thought he should wash his hair.

What?

I'm homeless, but I still manage to run my head under the gym shower every now and then. I'd suggest as often as you can, but don't knock yourself out there "bedhead." The nurses don't do that annual lice screening for their own health.

How often should you wash your hair?

Heck if I know. I ain't Vidal Sassoon, I ain't Paul Mitchell, and I ain't your daddy, so stop asking me these questions. How many hats do I have to wear around here? I don't get paid enough to be your personal stylist.

What are you going to ask me next? How many sheets of toilet paper you should use to wipe your butt? In fact, add that to the list of questions I never want to answer in my classroom along with:

"Why does it always stink in here?"

or

"Should I pop this?"

and

"Can you get dandruff on your eyebrows?"