The Rubber Band Ban

Another English teacher e-mailed the department the following:

It has come to my attention that students are coming to some of you and asking for rubber bands for my class under the guise that I was sending them to ask for me. This is not true. There is no activity where I need rubber bands. They are, in fact, shooting the rubber bands at me during class. In the future, if students approach you asking for rubber bands, not only refuse to give them any, but please get their names.

Honestly people, she yelled at me during a department meeting last month and doesn’t brew fresh coffee when she takes the last of it. So, I can’t guarantee that I’ll get any names. I may even stock up on rubber bands.

What?! Oh I’m just kidding—maybe.