Thursday, May 25, 2006

You want to try some weeded books? It will leave you wanting more.

We got an email from our librarian this morning. It seems the library is offering up materials from the collection. That's right--they were giving the teachers library scraps like we were animals. And trust me--animals we were. What is it with teachers and free publications? What is it with teachers and free anything? It could be the most useless thing in the world, but we're sure it's needed. Even if we have no idea what it could be.

I didn't get there until after school because my planning period was occupied by a parent explaining to me why her child failed, which was good because I thought it was because the kid never turned work, slept in class or was in juvi for distribution. It turns out that he is having a hard time with his girlfriend (A.K.A. his baby's momma).

Where was I? Right, free books. As I got to the library entrance the doors burst open and I was greeted by Mr. Page, the AP English teacher. His eyes were crazed, he was clutching materials to his chest, and he scampered off like Nazi troops were two blocks away. I picked some of the books that fell from his arm bundle. There was a manual for a Lite-Brite and a 1986 issue of Cat Fancy.

Inside I was met with a disaster scene. Two of the book carts were turned over--one wheel was still spinning, book pages were floating back to earth. I examined the rubble; and there was nothing but some Tiger Beats and a 5 1/4 inch floppy of Math Blaster. Before I could survey the rest, there was this scurrying figure that appeared in the corner of my eye, which left me scurrying back to my room.

The worst thing is that I'll never learn what Scott Baio looks for in a girlfriend.

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