Monday, February 19, 2007

I wonder if she got her dress from the ACME Corporation?

I covered for another teacher this past weekend at the Sadie Hawkins Day Dance. Don't worry, I didn't act out of charity, she had to eat a week's worth of my morning duty, so she and her husband could have a date night. I hope it was worth it.

As it turns out, this was my third year in a row to chaperone the thing, and it hasn't changed much since my first time. Many usually don't attend. I guess they're off having sex somewhere instead. And for those who are there, they looking for places to have sex.

Now, I only say this because there's this one student and every year she's trying to drag a boy off to some place where they shouldn't be. You guys know what I'm talking about. We've all been through it before. Again, I'm assuming that her purpose is debauchery, but you have to believe me. She's not even taking the same guy by the hand twice in a single night. I don't know about you, but I don't think she's looking for a private place to witness to these boys.

You should see it. She does this "testing a new part of the fence" thing, trying to find a weakness. First, she's heading to the band hall. Then, it's the vending machine alcove. Oh look, she's tugging on that gate in front of the library that comes down from the ceiling at night.

I don't mind it so much though. I just pretend that I'm in one of those Looney Tunes cartoons, with the coyote. Not the Road Runner ones, but the ones with the sheep dog, Sam. You know, where the coyote is trying to steal one of the sheep from the dog's flock, but fails miserably each time. The sheep dog foils him every time. The kookier the plan is, the bigger the disaster. Catapults backfire. TNT plungers fall at the wrong time, etc...

Anyway, it's so routine for the sheep dog and coyote to the point that they greet one another as they actually punch in on a time clock before getting the day started.

"Morning Ralph."

"Morning Sam."

What can I say. She's the coyote and I'm the sheepdog. Maybe next year she'll make a dummy of herself out of dynamite.

Atom XML

My site was nominated for Best Education Blog!
My site was nominated for Best Humor Blog!

[ Recent Posts ]


~Get the heck out of Dodge-ball.

~Loathe is in the air.

~Rated "J" for "Jack-A-Ninny"

~Going Down the Drains (or This job is draining.)

~Mana(gement) from Heaven

~Stupefy, Stupefy, Stupefy

~You'll go down in Historian

~A Winter Wonderland

~Too Much Information

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. That's our story and we're sticking to it.