Tuesday, February 01, 2005

I Won't Do That

"Is the test hard because I didn't read the last two chapters?"

"Well Suzie, let me just break out my 'I Only Read N% of the Book, So What Will My Grade Be?' Slide Ruler. It's made by the same people that brought you the 'I Didn't Take Notes, How Bad is That?' Meter."

No, I didn't say that, but I wanted to. I said it would hurt her--she knew that--she just wanted me to assure her that she would be okay.

I will stay late for these kids, I will field all their questions, I will do my best to make them feel comfortable while they are in my classroom, but I can't be dishonest with them. I can't pacify them if they don't do the work. My question is how have they learned to do stuff like that?

To steal from my man, Meatloaf (man, some meatloaf sounds good right now), "I will do anything for education, but I won't do that--I won't do that!"

Cue crashing piano solo.

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